The Quest For An Unforgettable Snack Pie

I appreciate the glory of a good pie, but it is not something that I make or even eat very often. My favorite is pecan pie, but even this delicacy is only consumed on Thanksgiving and the occasional Christmas party. But lately I have had a craving for a good chocolate pie.

Several months ago I risked my life to cross four lanes of traffic between my office and the convenience store in a very busy part of town. I purchased a packaged hand held chocolate pie (the kind surrounded by crust) and couldn't wait to get back to my desk to enjoy it. However, the center was the consistency of play-dough and I ended up throwing it away.  Flash forward several weeks later and I make the same treacherous excursion across the road and decided I would give the pie another try. I get back to the office and this one was even worse.

Now this particular brand had been a favorite of mine and I had never had a problem with them in the past. I was so upset that I wasted my money twice that I contacted the company and complained.  I have since received a letter of apology and a coupon for a free product. I had assumed this would be their response, but I have no inclination of trying them again any time soon.

Last week and this week I have tried two other brands and have been less than enthused. In fact, both were thrown away after a few bites. I hate wasting food like that.

To say I love chocolate is an understatement. I have hidden in a closet before because I wanted to eat chocolates that I had no intention of sharing. Some people smoke, do drugs, shop...I eat chocolate. So I became a tad obsessed with the idea of making my own chocolate snack pie.  I did a quick search for recipes on the internet, and although they looked good there was just something lacking in the ingredients list.  I love butter just as much as the next fat girl, but a filling of just butter, sugar and chocolate just didn't seem magical enough for me. I want decadent. I want special. I want pie that keeps me awake at night--and not because of heartburn.

In the middle of the night my mind (or the voice of God, which one I will never be sure) uttered the word "cheesecake" and woke me up. For the next hour I considered all the different ways cream cheese could be the base for a beautiful snack pie.  But I didn't want it to be a "cheesecake" pie. I want the silk, the goo, the filling that is so good I'm weeping at the same time I'm trying to smash my face into the pie's gaping center of nirvana....wait...where was I?

Oh yes. I want the perfect filling.

For me texture is very important. In fact, it is the primary key to the reason I am such a picky eater. I love fruit juices, but can't stand the fruit itself because of texture.  I adore ice-cream but only eat it if there is a nut or some other goody mixed in it that I can chew.  There are plenty more examples and it may seem weird, but that is how I roll.  And if the texture is off in the slightest way, I just can't go on.

So I take my dream and a few dollars to the grocery and settle on a package of cream cheese and some semi-sweet chocolate chips. Then I went to work on constructing my very own snack pies. For some reason the image of a cannoli kept popping in my head, so my first attempt at a snack pie was inspired by pretty pictures I've seen of this Italian treat.  My daughter helped me prepare everything and she named this first batch "The Chocolate Boops."



The Chocolate Boops

One 8 oz. package of room temperature cream cheese
3/4 cup powdered sugar
3 oz. semi-sweet chocolate chips
One ready made pie crust at room temperature
1 Tbs. milk


Preheat the oven to 425 degrees. Cream the sugar and cream cheese together until incorporated, then fold in the chocolate chips.  Roll out the pie crust and cut into desired shapes (in this case I used a biscuit cutter to make 4 inch circles).  Dip a finger tip into the milk and lightly go around the edge of the crust. Place a small amount of the filling in the center and fold, pressing the edges together.  Place on an ungreased baking sheet and bake for 10 minutes, or until golden brown.

Notice how they didn't seal closed? That is because I forgot the milk and just used water and made the pretty crimps with a fork to seal. It didn't quit work, plus I over filled just a bit. I also hated wasting the dough scraps, so I fashioned them around some filling and made "snack pillows."

On the second batch I melted the chocolate and folded it into the cream cheese, then used milk to seal it and it stayed closed just fine. I also dusted them with powdered sugar because my daughter didn't think they were sweet enough for her.



Were they good? Yes.  Was it what I was looking for in a snack pie? No.

They were light, delicate, and  I did enjoy eating them. But my first attempt was only a marginal success.

Will I find the perfect recipe? Can I find the combination that will produce the results I long for? Will my already sausage-casing-like "skinny jeans" be able to hold up?

Stay tuned for the next exciting episode.

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